Here is my follow-up post in the forum about precious Nesta. To save from another re-hash, I have just copied and pasted it.
Well….I’m back. Been avoiding writing this for a day. My heart is shattered; I’m at a loss and I don’t know what to do. Nesta is in bad shape. How in the world this happened so quickly, I will never understand! All a sudden, he has two large tumors on his spleen, and several smaller ones on his liver. He has loose fluid and blood in his abdomen, which shows he has been bleeding internally. I knew something was happening, and actually I think I can even say that I know the bleeding must have occurred last Thursday night, when I could tell something was happening with him. The oncologist says she does not recommend any treatments from here, like chemo or even surgery. Damn it! What happened? We were doing so well. She says he has anywhere from a day to a month left in him. But how and when am I supposed to decide that? What is going to happen? She says this is very uncharacteristic of osteosarcoma to redevelop in the abdomen, but she has seen it before. She mentioned it could also be hemangiosarcoma. But we will never know without doing surgery. How can it be that such a healthy vibrant dog could get two different kinds of terrible cancer? She said in all her years, she has only seen about 6 cases of osteosarcoma moving into the abdomen. But maybe we are in that small percent.
Right now he is very dumpy. Being very picky about what he eats, just wants to lie around. Goes outside only to pee and then wants to come right back in. His belly is swollen and looks heavy. But it wasn’t like that last week!! I can’t believe this. How do you know when it’s time? I am still hung up on some miracle happening. I don’t want to just give up. But maybe Nesta wouldn’t mind that? Ugh. This is the hardest thing (besides loosing my mom when I was 19) that I have ever had to go through. I have regrets. Maybe I should have done chemo. Or maybe he would still be battling this anyway. I feel like I should have/could have done more. I know, I know, don’t feel that way. But its so damn hard not too! He is my soul mate, my best friend, the love of my LIFE. this hurts so bad. – See more at: http://tripawds.com/forums/treatment-and-recovery/need-advice-quick/#sthash.gpZ4WE49.dpuf
🙁 I’m so sorry about the news. I wish there was a perfect Answer. God knows there isn’t in this disease. I honestly think that there is no perfect time. I think on some level you’ll know. If you feel like there is some fight left by all means we are all behind you 🙂 ugh. Mostly just offering my support here. I can relate to the pain of the loss of a parent and how much it hurts to lose our loved fur babies. And that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. I hope that no matter how long you have with him, that somewhere you can find some peace and comfort with nesta. What a lucky baby to be loved so much
My thoughts and support are with you,
Lori and chuck
Oh Sweet Sir Nesta I am sooo sorry to hear this. I’m going to g over to your other post in a minute and see what otjers have come up with.
Everyone here second guesses…it’s just normal so I wn’t try and tell you not to. I will say for now though, put ALL that on hold and just be present and in the moment with Nesta.
Nothing’s changed in his world. He feels dumpy but that’s very different from being in awful pain.
Every dog is different and NO ONE kows timeframes…NO ONE! Hope is a powerful tool in your arsenal.
Right now you two are together. Right now he may be tired but he’s still Nesta……..he just doesn’t feel like running a marathon.
I will add one more thing re chemo……if something happens “quickly” , people think they shouldn’t have done chemo as that caused damage to the good cells and compromised the immune system, etc. , if they don’t do chemo and something happens quickly, then they wish they had. It’s a crap shoot. Some do well with chemo, some do not. Nesta probavly had these in the works long before amputation….and it’s possible the amp. did so ehow actually slow them down and from spreading faster.
I’m just so sorry yo are going through this. Lean on us. Cry, vent, yell scream, but be fully present with Nesta.
Let nothing rob you of your time together. Nesta’s not foing amywhere yet, okay?
Miracles do happen!
Surrounding you with love, strength and tripawd hugs.
Sally and Happy Hannah
Lump in throat….I’m teary for you and your pack. Damn cancers. The worst! I hope the next day or so there’s some peace, some coming to grips with what’s happening. Nesta is in great care and we know is loved, terribly and deeply.
~ Katy & Jackson
Kassi,
I am so sorry to hear about Sir Nesta. Cancer just sucks. Love on him and just enjoy what time you have left. I am thinking about you
Hugs
Michelle & Angel Sassy
Oh no, I don’t know how I missed this. I was just commenting on your latest post. Our guys give us so so much and we always feel like we can’t give them enough. It’s so hard it feels like our hearts are being ripped from us. It just shows what special family members they are to us, it hurts, hurts hurts. ..my thoughts are with you wishing and praying for a miracle or turn around for Sir Nesta.